All Those Lines
by BTRlover98
Summary: "The amount of lines on your hand are the amount of people in the world that love you, and I love you the most." When Katie doesn't see those lines, can Kendall help her?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, I decided I'm going to_ try _to write this new story. I don't know if it'll be good, but I'm writing it because I sometimes feel all alone and stuff, and I'm sure a lot of other people do too. This is gonna be short, like, probably 5 chapters or something, but I hope it's good! :]**

**I don't own Big Time Rush or Guess How Much I love You.**

"Then he lay down close by and whispered with a smile, 'I love you to the moon, and _back'._"

Eleven-year-old Kendall Knight closed the little book in his hands, smiling, and looked down at his little sister. The small girl was resting her head against his arm and staring at the hares on the cover of the _Guess How Much I Love You _book. She looked as though she was deep in thought, her tiny head cocked to the side, her eyes squinted slightly, and a small frown upon her face.

"Kendall? Does the daddy rabbit really love the baby rabbit that much?" she asked, still not taking her eyes off the book.

"Yeah, of course he does. Just like Mommy and Daddy love _us_ that much," he answered, his green eyes looking down at her. She finally tore her eyes away from the animals and looked up at her brother.

"Do Mommy and Daddy really love us that much?" she questioned.

"Yes, they do, Katie," he replied.

"Do _you_ love _me_?"

"Of course I do! I love you to the moon and back," he told her with a smile. "Even more than that, if it's possible!"

Katie smiled a little. "But sometimes you don't love me," she said sadly. Kendall raised his eyebrows.

"Oh, really? When is that?" he asked.

"When we fight," she answered with a shrug. Kendall laughed and rolled his eyes, smiling down at his sister.

"Just because we fight sometimes doesn't mean I don't love you!" he exclaimed. "I love you all the time, even if I say I'm mad at you or you're being annoying or...anything," he told her. Katie smiled.

"Are you sure?"

"Yup, I'm positive!" he replied.

"Will you love me forever?" she asked hopefully. Kendall chuckled.

"Yes, Katie, I'll love you forever."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!" Kendall exclaimed. "Why don't you believe me?"

Katie shrugged. "Sometimes, I don't think you or Mommy or Daddy or James, Carlos, and Logan love me," she said quietly. "Because sometimes, I'm annoying."

Kendall frowned at her. "Katie, we all love you very much. You're not annoying," he assured her. When she didn't respond and only looked down at her hands, Kendall went on. "Give me your hand," he commanded. Katie held out her hand, and Kendall gently grabbed her wrist. "See all those lines on your palm?" he asked. "That's how many people in this world love you," he explained.

Katie looked at him in confusion. "Well, there's only four," she said.

"No, there's like, three hundred!" he exclaimed. "There's only four big ones, but there are so many small ones!"

"Oh," she said softly. "So people do love me?"

"Of course! And I love you the most!" he chirped.

Katie smiled, "I love you too, Big Brother!"

The older boy hopped off his sister's bed before pulling the covers up to her chin. "Okay, go to sleep now, Katie," he said. "I love you to the moon and back!" he assured her with a smile. "Don't forget that, okay?"

Katie nodded and wrapped her tiny arms around her brother. "I love you to the moon and back, and back to the moon and back, and back to the moon and back again, and ba-"

"I get it," he laughed, cutting her off. Kendall kissed her head lightly before slowly turning around, shutting the lights off, and leaving the room.

As the blonde boy walked toward his bedroom, he wondered why Katie would ever think he didn't love her. He felt guilty about it, because obviously, he had to have said something to her to make her think that.

He just hoped she would never feel that way again.

**Alright, I know this was super bad and short, but I wanted to put it up today, and I'm about to go to some shindig at my school. I hope you liked it, and again, sorry it was short. Welp...um...Review? :]**


	2. Chapter 2

**Guys, I am so busy. I'm sorry I barely ever have time to come on here, I just have so many things going on.. But, I wanted to tell you a fun story! Okay, so, I got into a real life fight with a real life One Direction fan. Ha. If you like One Direction, I'm not a mean person who yelled at the girl saying they were stupid and everything, so don't get mad at me. She was telling me that BTR was ugly and stupid, so I freaked out at her and said that 1D fans were getting really mean and they needed to leave BTR alone because they don't even know them. So...yeah. I don't think anyone reading this would hate BTR, but if for some reason you do, DON'T. My family called me phsyco for yelling at her, but really, it got me so mad, 'cause I love them, and...you don't insult Big Time Rush in front of me and not get yelled at. Did that make sense? Okay, this is getting long and I think I'm just rambling now, so anyway...**

**Thanks for all the reviews! :] If I didn't reply to all of them, I'm sorry. I feel so lazy and sick right now, but...yeah, thank you so much! **

**I don't own Big Time Rush!**

"Can you please just leave us alone, Katie? We have no time at all anymore, and this is our only free time we have, so go away!"

Twelve-year-old Katie Knight stared at her big brother in surprise. She looked at him sadly before trying to talk again. "But, Kendall, I just wanted-"

"Shut up!" he yelled, frustrated. "God, you're so annoying!"

Katie sighed, glancing at Carlos, Logan, and James, who were just staring at her. "Sorry," she whispered, before slowly turning around and leaving her brothers' bedroom. She walked back to her own room, hanging her head to hide the tears that were threatening to fall. She just wanted to talk to her brother. Didn't he see that she was lonely? She had no one to talk to, other than her mother, but what twelve-year-old girl wanted to spend all her time talking to their mom?

After closing her bedroom door, Katie sat down on her bed and wiped away the tear that was slowly falling down her cheek. At the moment, she wanted to go back to Minnesota so badly. She had no friends here, and the only person she could talk to was Bitters, who was possibly the most annoying man in the world.

For a few minutes, Katie debated whether or not she should go talk to Bitters, and finally, when she got too bored, she decided to go to the lobby. She walked into the kitchen to find Kendall, Carlos, Logan, and James looking for whatever food they could find, but she didn't say anything. She walked right by them towards the door.

"Katie."

She stopped, sighing, and turned around to look at her brother.

"What?" she asked grumpily.

"Where are you going?" Kendall questioned.

"To the lobby," she answered.

"To do what?"

She shrugged, "I don't know."

Kendall gave her a weird look. "Are you okay? Your eyes are kinda red," he pointed out.

"I'm fine," she said softly.

"Okay, well...I think we're having dinner soon, so don't stay down there too long,"

Katie nodded before turning on her heal and leaving the apartment.

_How could he act like nothing happened? _she asked herself. She wasn't sure if she was overreacting, but he could have at least apologized for being a jerk to her. She did nothing wrong when she went into his room.

As Katie stepped into the elvator, she ran into the Jennifers. Sighing, she went to the corner to try to avoid them the best she could.

"Um, exuse me?" the curly haired Jennifer said, clearing her throat. Katie glanced up to find all three of them staring at her.

"What?" she asked.

"We asked you if you knew where Tyler was," the blonde Jennifer said, rolling her eyes at Katie, who sighed and roller her eyes right back.

"No, I haven't seen him."

"Of course you haven't," the last Jennifer muttered. "Could you just hurry up and get out of here? We don't want to be stuck in the same elevator as_ you_."

The doors suddenly opened and Katie walked out without saying another word to the girls. She went up to Bitters' desk and tried to think of something to say that would insult the man.

"Hey," she said.

"Oh, great, what do you want?" Bitters mumbled, staring down at Katie with abored expression. She just stared back at him. "Seriously. I don't need the little devil annoying me all day!"

Katie nodded her head slowly before turning around and walking away. Usually, that was a normal thing for Bitters to say. Why was it hurting her so much today? She looked around the lobby to see if anyone was around, but everyone there was just ignoring her, as usual.

How come she never noticed that no one liked her before today?

**BIG TIME RUSH WON! AHH! Okay, yeah, I spazzed and cried. I'm a bit too obsessed with them.**

**Anyway, sorry this was short, and sorry I never update. I don't even get a spring break. My Easter break is from Thursday to Monday.. Bleh. Well, yeah, I have a huuuge science test tomorrow, so I don't know if I can write any more, but I'll try.**

**Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it! :]**


	3. Chapter 3

**Everything I've been writing recently has been horrible, so I'm going to try to make this good. It probably won't happen, though, and I apologize.**

**I don't own Big Time Rush!**

The lonliness she felt as she sat alone in the cafeteria full of kids was unbearable. The popular kids teasing her made her feel so weak and small. The kids laughing around her made her extremely jealous. The tears that stung her eyes helped her realize that she had no friends.

Didn't anyone notice she was all alone? Didn't they feel bad _at all_? Couldn't they see that she was feeling hurt and upset? Why wasn't anyone paying attention to her? She never realized how much it hurt to be ignored.

After realizing she probably looked like a loser, Katie stood up, threw her trash out, and headed to her next class. She was the first one to get there, but she was actually happy about that. The other kids would tease her, and she knew it. She just didn't understand how she was able to ignore it before, when now, it felt like she was being stabbed with each word.

Katie sat down at her desk and put her head down. Was there anyone who actually liked her? She knew Kendall and her mother really did love her, but sometimes, it felt like they didn't. And sometimes, she needed more than just family to love her. Sure, she had Logan, Carlos, and James, who technically weren't family, but she didn't think they counted.

She realized then how much she missed Minnesota and all of her old friends. But they all probably forgot about her, anyway. She was a boring, stupid loser, so why would they miss her at all?

"Hey, Katie. What are you doing?" Tyler asked as he took a seat next to her.

She had completely forgotten about Tyler, her only friend. Or was he her friend? She didn't really know for sure.

"Just thinking," she replied quietly. Tyler nodded, looking bored. "Do you wanna go to the pool after school?" Katie asked, trying to start a conversation, and maybe get an official friend.

"I don't think I can, my mom is making me go to an audition," he replied. "Sorry..."

Katie sighed, "That's okay."

So she didn't have any friends.

* * *

>Katie trudged into apartment 2J later that day after school, threw her backpack onto the ground, ignoring her homework, and plopped down on the orange couch. No one was home, which meant she could finally be by herself and just watch TV and do whatever she wanted.<p><p>

She sat on the couch for hours, watching pointless shows and movies as she waited for her family to come home. At 8:00, she started to wonder if anyone even cared about her, because she had been home alone, no one fed her any dinner, and no one even bothered to call. She knew Kendall, Carlos, Logan, and James were at the studio, and they probably didn't have much free time, but she had no idea where her mother was.

Suddenly, the door burst open and Mrs. Knight walked in, followed by Kendall, James, Logan, and Carlos, who had a cast on his arm. Katie gave them a confused look.

"Carlos fell on his arm while the boys were learning a new dance move," Mrs. Knight explained.

"Why didn't you call to tell me?" Katie asked, feeling more hurt than before.

"Sorry, sweetheart, I just forgot."

Katie stared at her for a moment in surprise, but Mrs. Knight didn't even seem to notice. How could she have forgotten about her own daughter? How could she leave her daughter home alone all day and not even tell her why? Katie sighed.

"I'm just gonna go to bed," she said softly as she began to walk away.

"Wait, Katie, did you eat? We can have some dinner," Mrs. Knight offered.

"I'm not hungry," she muttered, before she slammed her bedroom door shut.

* * *

>"Katie, get up! It's time for school!"<p><p>

Katie rolled over in bed after hearing Kendall knock on her door. She stared at the closed door for a minute, tears pooling up in her eyes as yesterday's events replayed in her head.

"Katie! Wake up!"

"I'm up..." she mumbled. She climbed out of bed and quickly changed, not bothering to brush her hair or make herself look nice. She walked out of her room, and when she saw her schoolbag sitting against the wall, she suddenly remembered that she didn't do any of her homework. She couldn't tell her mother, however, because she was supposed to do it as soon as she got home from school.

"Good morning, Katie," Mrs. Knight said, smiling at her. Kendall, Carlos, Logan, and James, who were all sitting at the table eating breakfast already, turned to look at her.

"Good morning," she said as she sat down in her seat. Her mother put a plate of food in front of her, but she only stared at it. She realized she wasn't hungry at all, despite the fact that she hadn't eaten anything since lunch the day before.

"You okay?" Kendall asked her, noticing that she didn't touch any of her food.

"I'm fine," she muttered, but Kendall gave her a weird look when she miserably put her head down on the table.

"Katie...?"

"I'm fine," she repeated.

But somehow, Kendall could tell she wasn't.

**Okay, was this long enough? And good enough? Let me know, because I feel bad about writing so many short chapters recently.**

**Welp, I gotta go study.. I hope you liked this! Review?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! Thanks for all the reviews! :] I'm glad you all liked the last chapter! I have no idea what to say now,haha..**

**I don't own Big Time Rush!**

"So you didn't do it?" Ms. Winson asked as she put her hands on her hips and gave Katie a nasty look. Katie shook her head slowly, staring down at her desk. "The homework was so easy! Why didn't you do it?"

"My brother was in the hospital," Katie said softly. Even if Katie wasn't at the hospital with Carlos, it was still true.

"Oh, was he? Why?"

Katie felt tears stinging her eyes and her cheeks heat up. "He broke his arm," she whispered, knowing she wouldn't get away with that excuse.

rolled her eyes and glared at Katie. "Fine, then I guess you'll just have to do it tonight, along with a two-page essay on why you shouldn't lie and make up stupid excuses!"

Finally, Katie looked up at her teacher, disbelief and a few tears shining in her innocent brown eyes. "But-"

"No buts!" Ms. Winson interrupted, before walking away from Katie's desk.

Katie could hear her classmates giggling, and she could feel their eyes on her. She tried to ignore it, but suddenly, a note was thrown onto her desk.

_Were you too busy crying over your stupid life last night to do your homework?_

She felt even more tears in her eyes, but she refused to let any fall. Why didn't she ever realize how pathetic she was? Her classmates hated her, and she had no idea. She was so stupid for not doing her homework, and she could only hope the other teachers wouldn't be as cruel as Ms. Winson.

* * *

><p>"HA! I JUST BATTLE BLASTED ALL THREE OF YOU!"<p>

Katie smiled a little from outside her apartment after hearing James scream at his friends. Clearly, the boys were playing video games, and she was thankful, because that meant she could easily sneak off to her room without being noticed. She had so much homework to do tonight, and she didn't want to see anyone for the rest of the day.

However, when she walked inside, she found out her brothers were waiting for her to get home.

"Hey, Katie!" Carlos exclaimed. "Wanna come play with us?" he asked hopefully. The four of them all smiled innocently at her, none of them noticing how upset she was.

"No thanks," she muttered. "I have a lot of homework." Kendall rolled his eyes at her. For a second, she thought he was mad at her for some reason, but then he shot her a playful grin.

"It's Friday," he said. "You can do your homework later! At least come watch us for a little! We never get to spend any time with each other anymore!" he begged.

"Sorry, I just wanna get it all done," she replied.

"Are you going out with friends tonight?" James asked, and Katie sighed.

_I don't have friends_, she thought.

"No," she mumbled.

"Oh, okay. Well, just come get us if you're bored!" Logan told her. Katie nodded before walking off to her room.

She closed the door behind her, dropped her things on the ground, and plopped down on her bed. She wondered why her brothers even thought she had friends. She was always either alone, or hanging out with them. And it was then she realized she would rather be with them than be alone. However, she knew how annoying she was. They didn't want her around, and she didn't want to bother them.

* * *

><p>Kendall watched Katie as she dragged herself to her room, keeping her head down. He sighed and turned to his friends.<p>

"Did you guys notice anything different about Katie?" he asked. "She seems like she's been really upset lately."

"Well, maybe a little," James replied. "But I only noticed today. Maybe she's just tired," he suggested. Kendall nodded, trying to tell himself that, but for some reason, it seemed like something else was going on.

"Do you think I should go talk to her?" he questioned. Carlos, Logan, and James shrugged, and Kendall sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"I guess you should," Logan said. Kendall nodded before standing up and walking towards Katie's room.

He stood outside the door for a moment, trying to hear if she was crying. Suddenly, he heard a frustrated sigh, some pages being flipped, and a tiny sob that was so quiet, he could barely hear it. He nervously knocked on the door.

"Katie? Can I come in?" he said softly.

"No."

Kendall sighed, "Why not? I just want to talk to you for a minute," he told her.

"Fine," she muttered.

Kendall slowly pushed the door open and stepped inside. He found Katie sitting on her bed with about four different books opened in front of her. He saw her red eyes and knew that she was crying, but he also knew she didn't want him to know, so he pretended not to notice.

"Wow, you really do have a lot of homework," he said. She nodded, avoiding his gaze. Kendall shut the door behind him and sat down on her bed. "So, um...how was your day?" he asked.

"Good," she said quietly. "Why?"

Kendall took a deep breath. "Uh...you just seemed a little bit sad when you got home," he answered.

"Well, I guess..." Katie stopped in the middle of her sentence. She felt a little weird telling Kendall why she was upset. And she didn't want him to find out everybody hated her. It would be way too embarrassing.

"What? Katie, if something's wrong, you can tell me," Kendall assured her. For a moment, Katie considered telling him, but she knew he would just get mad and embarrass her even more at school by yelling at everyone.

"Nothing, I just had a bad day," she said softly.

"Oh. Okay, as long as nothing's wrong," he shrugged. "Do you need a hug?" he asked her with a smile. Katie smiled back and nodded, knowing it would make her feel a little bit better. Kendall pulled her into his arms and squeezed her tightly. "Just let me know if you're feeling sad," he told her.

Katie nodded, but she knew she wouldn't be able to tell him. He would never understand.

**AHHH, OH MY GOODNESS. BACKSTAGE RUSH. I'M FREAKING OUT. SEASON 3. YESSSS. I didn't think I would be able to wait any longer! Thank goodness it's starting! :D**

**I hope you liked this! Review? :]**


	5. Chapter 5

**This story is perfect for me right now. I feel so alone. :( Nooo, but my best friend was being mean to me, and my other best friend was being annoying to me. So, yeah. I wish Big Time Rush would come comfort me, haha :] **

**I don't own Big Time Rush.**

As the weeks slowly passed, Katie felt lonelier and lonelier. Even more kids at school were treating her as if she was a piece of trash, her mother was always with Tyler's mom, and her brothers were always working, which meant she barely got to see them anymore. It didn't seem like they cared, though. When they were home, they barely even acknowledged Katie.

At first, she tried to tell herself that she was just having some bad days, but as the time wore on, she realized that no one really liked her, and she didn't even have a reason to be alive. Her dreams of taking over LA were stupid, she knew it, and there was nothing else that she really wanted to do.

When she was around Kendall, she tried to act normal and happy, and he seemed to believe her, because he hadn't mentioned anything else about her being upset. She was relieved, but at the same time, she almost wanted him to notice, just so he could make her feel better. However, sometimes she didn't think he would be able to. She knew he probably didn't care that much.

"Hey, Katie!"

Katie turned around in her desk to look at the girl sitting behind her, who had just tapped her shoulder and was holding out a note to her.

"Here," the girl said shoving the note in Katie's hand.

She slowly turned back around and glanced up at the teacher to make sure she wasn't looking before opening to folded piece of paper. She read over it at least five times before the tears pooled up in her eyes.

_When are you going to realize no one likes you? We would all be better off if you were just dead... Think about that._

She stared at the words for a minute while trying to blink her tears away. She heard some other kids laughing behind her and she felt all of their eyes on her. She tried to ignore them all as she stuffed the note into her pocket, and she did her best to make herself look like she didn't care.

But she did care. And she was starting to believe them all.

* * *

><p><em>When are you going to realize no one likes you? We would all be better off if you were just dead... Think about that.<em>

The words ran through Katie's mind as she sat down on her bed later that day. She already knew no one liked her. The only people in the world who actually cared about her were her mother and Kendall. She knew that. But did they really all want her to be dead?

She took the note out of her pocket and let a tear slip out of her eye as she read it once again. She wondered if the person who wrote it knew how much it would hurt her.

_We would all be better off if you were just dead..._

They were probably right. No one needed her. No one loved her. The only people who would be upset if she died were her mother and Kendall, but they would get over it fast. They would be better off without her anyway. It would make their life a whole lot easier if they didn't have a stupid little girl to take care of.

Suddenly, Katie heard a knock on her door.

"Yeah?" she asked.

"Katie, do you know where my lucky comb is?"

She sighed. "No, James."

"Can I come in and look for it?"

"It's not in here," she replied.

"Are you sure? Can I just come look, please?" he repeated.

Katie sighed once again and quickly wiped away all her tears. "Fine, you have thirty seconds!"

The door burst open and James ran frantically around the room, looking all over for his comb. Katie watched him, counting in her head, and then she saw his stupid comb sticking out of his back pocket.

"James," she started, rolling her eyes, "your comb is in your pocket!"

He stood up and reached into his pocket, laughing as he pulled out his comb. "Oh, thanks, Ka- Hey are you crying?" he asked. Katie raised her eyebrows in confusion for a moment before shaking her heard quickly. "Are you sure? Your eyes are all red," he pointed out.

Katie frowned at him. "No they're not," she said.

James rolled his eyes and sat down next to her. "Yeah, they are, Katie. Seriously, what's wrong?"

"Nothing..." Katie muttered sadly.

"Was someone being mean to you?" James asked, now looking a bit angry. ''Cause you can tell me, I'll go talk to them! I'll beat them up if-"

"No, it's fine, James!" Katie interrupted.

"What's that?" James asked, pointing to the piece of paper in her hand. He tried to grab it from her, but she pulled her hand away quickly.

"It's nothing," she replied. James looked at her for a moment. He knew something was wrong, and he had a feeling it was about that paper.

"If it's nothing, can I see it?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at her.

"It was just a reminder that I had a project due," she lied.

"What project?"James questioned. "What's it about?"

"Nothing, James! Could you just leave me alone please? Get out of here!"

James sighed and grabbed the note out of her hand before she could stop him. Her eyes widened and she reached over to try to get it back from him, but he wouldn't let her. She jumped on top of him and pulled on his hair, but he refused to let go of it.

"James, stop! Give it back!" she screamed.

The pretty boy unfolded the paper and tried to ignore Katie yanking on his beautiful hair. Katie finally let go of him when she knew she wouldn't be able to stop him from reading it. She watched as his eyes widened and his face softened, and he looked up at her with so much sadness and shock that she had to look away. She felt tears sting her eyes once again.

"Did someone give you this?" James asked softly.

Katie nodded her head sadly and wiped at her eyes, trying to stop the torrent of tears that was about to fall. Suddenly, she felt James' arms around her, and his hands gently rubbing her back. She sobbed into his shirt, and it felt good to finally let it out.

"Who gave you this?" James asked. Katie heard the fury in her voice, and she actually _wanted _James to beat up the kid who wrote it. But she didn't know who wrote it.

"I d-don't know. B-but everyone a-agrees. Everyone w-wants me to b-be d-dead!" she cried. "A-and I-I just w-want to be dead t-too!" she sobbed.

"Katie, no! Don't you dare say that!" James exclaimed. "Those kids are all idiots! I swear, I will go and punch every single one of them in the face so I can knock some sense into them! They should never, _ever _treat you like that!"

Katie hugged James closer to her as she tried to calm herself down. "I-it's n-not fair! W-why d-does everyone h-h-hate m-me?" she cried.

James felt his heard shatter when he heard her. Did she really think that? What had those kids done to convince her she was so unloved? And why didn't she know that her family, and so many other people, loved her with all their hearts. He lifted her head up and forced her to look at him. Her red, swollen eyes stared up into his as he began to speak to her with a gentle, loving voice, hoping to prove to her how much he loved her.

"Katie, I have no idea why those kids said things like this to you. They had absolutely no right to do it. And I know that they only said it because they're jealous, and they wish they could have the same amount of love in their lives as you have in yours."

"B-but n-no one l-loves me," she whispered sadly, quickly looking away from him to hide her embarrassment.

"No one loves you?" James repeated. Katie nodded shyly and James shook his head, anger and sadness filling him to the brim. "Katie Knight, I never thought it was possible for you to forget that me, Carlos, Logan, Kendall, your mother, my family, Carlos' family, Logan's family, your old friends, even Gustavo and Kelly love you more than you will ever know."

"Maybe you do, but family doesn't count, and I never see my friends anymore," she told him. James sighed, because he had no idea what else he was supposed to say to her.

"That's not the point, Katie. Maybe Kendall can-"

"No! Don't tell Kendall! Please!" Katie suddenly shouted. James narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"Why not?" he asked.

"I don't want him to see the note. Or anyone else," she answered. "Please, James? Don't tell anyone," she begged. James sighed once again and pulled her into a bone-crushing hug.

"Fine, but if you ever need to talk about it, come to me. Okay?"

"Okay," Katie said softly.

"I love you so much," James whispered as he kissed her head.

"I love you too, James."

**Was this good at all? I kinda wanted to use someone other than Kendall, and I thought it was a little cute :]**

**Oh, guys, I have two things to say about The Hunger Games. One: my stupid teacher thinks Prim was a figment of Katniss' imagination. Does anyone else think that is the dumbest thing in the world? I mean, Katniss wouldn't have been in the Hunger Games if it wasn't for Prim! Right? YES. Ugh, my teacher is so annoying. But anyway, the second thing is that when my family goes camping over the summer, we're gonna be in the Hunger Games, but we're not gonna kill. We're gonna do something else, but I'm so excited!**

**Oh, and Happy Mother's Day! :D**

**Review?**


	6. Chapter 6

**WAZZZAAA! Oh my gosh, Big Time Rush is killing me with Windows Down, and they're music video was shot of them having fun in Hawaii. I think I might die.**

**I don't own Big Time Rush.**

Katie woke up the next morning, completely forgetting about everything that happened the day before. She had a wonderful dream that they were all still in Minnesota and she was with her old friends, but realization hit quickly when she spotted the note on the ground. Last night's events rushed through her head, and she prayed that James hadn't told anyone about what happened.

She slowly changed out of her pajamas, dreading facing James again. She glanced at the clock and saw that it was only 8:00, which meant everyone would still be home. She could smell the fresh pancakes her mother had made, which forced her to leave her room because she didn't eat dinner the night before and she could feel her stomach grumbling.

She walked into the dining room, and instantly, all eyes were on her. She looked at James, who shook his head, silently promising he didn't tell anyone. "Hi..." she said, giving them all weird looks.

"Hey," Kendall replied. "What were you doing last night? You were in your room all night," he asked.

"I just had a lot of homework," she lied. She sat down and her mother put a plate of pancakes in front of her. They all continued to stare at her, and she rolled her eyes. "Seriously, why are you staring at me?" she asked.

They all shrugged and went back to their pancakes, except for James. He continued to watch her with a worried look, and Katie sighed, glaring at him.

"So, Katie, do you have anything you want to tell us?" James asked. Katie sent him her meanest look before everyone else looked at her.

"No," she said. "Why would I?"

"Well, you were in your room all night, I didn't know if maybe...you were upset or-"

"I'm fine!" she interrupted, still narrowing her eyes at him. "Just leave me alone. Just because I don't have as many friends as you guys doesn't mean you can make me feel bad about it," she muttered as she got out of her seat and began to walk back to her room.

"Katie, wait, he didn't mean it like that," Carlos called out. Katie ignored him, knowing it was too late to turn around now that there were tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

* * *

><p>The four boys and Mrs. Knight sat at the table, all confused for a few minutes before Kendall finally spoke up.<p>

"Has anyone else noticed how easily she's been getting upset recently?" he asked. Everyone nodded in response. "Does anyone know why?"

They were all silent, and James nervously looked around the room, hoping he didn't look suspicious. He was considering telling them what happened the night before, but he knew he couldn't; he promised Katie, and she would kill him if he broke that promise.

"Well, I'm going to go find out," Kendall told them all as he stood up.

"No, I will!" James said, standing up. "I made her upset, so I'll just go apologize," he said. Kendall shrugged and sat back down as James hurried out of the room.

He stood outside of Katie's room for a minute because he knew she would be mad at him, and he was sure she would punch him or something. He forced himself to knock on the door.

"What?" Katie shouted.

"Can I come in?" James asked.

"No!"

The pretty boy rolled his eyes and ignored her before pushing the door open. He found Katie sitting on her bed, glaring at him, and she stood up right away, walked across the room, and punched him right in the stomach. James groaned.

"Katie, I'm sorry! Was that really necessary?" he questioned.

"Yes!" she replied. "Now get out!"

James sighed. "Katie, I'm really sorry, okay? I just thought it might be a good idea if you told Kendall! He can tell something is wrong, he just doesn't know what it is."

"Well, I don't care, I'm fine," she muttered. "Just go away!"

James sighed again before turning around and leaving. Katie slammed the door behind him. Kendall didn't care. If he did, he would have said something to her. No one cared. Not even James. She knew it.

Katie sat back down on her bed and thought about that. No one cared. _No one_. So what was the point of living if no one cared about her? There was no point. She laid her head back on her pillow and closed her eyes, trying to get that thought out of her head.

She heard the four boys yell a goodbye to her mother and the door closing before there was another knock on her door.

"Katie? Can I come in?"

"Sure," she mumbled. The door opened and her mother walked in. She sat down next to Katie on the bed.

"Are you okay, sweetie? Are you upset about something?"

"No, I'm fine," she replied.

"Are you sure? You seem like you've been really sad. We're all just worried. You can tell me, honey," she said.

"I'm okay, Mom, nothing's wrong," Katie lied, smiling at her mother.

Mrs. Knight sighed and kissed her daughter's head. "Okay, well, I have to run to the store. Will you be okay here alone?" Katie nodded, and Mrs. Knight waved goodbye before leaving the room.

Katie waited until she heard her mother leave before exiting her room and going into the living room. She saw that her brothers' video games were still up, and she groaned, knowing if she turned it off, they would kill her, which meant she couldn't watch TV. She threw her head back on the couch and tried to think about something happy, but everything she thought about led back to the note she got and made her think horrible thoughts. No one loved her, and the world would be better if she was dead. She tried her hardest to push that thought out of her head, but it kept coming back.

As if on cue, her phone beeped in her pocket. She pulled it out, expecting to see a text from one of her brothers, but instead, it was a text from a number she didn't know. She opened it, and felt a tear slip from her eye after reading it.

_Have you done it yet? We're all waiting! I'm sure your family is too, so what are you waiting for? No one's gonna miss you!_

Anger filled her to the brim as more tears stung her eyes. She clenched the phone in her hand before standing up and walking to the bathroom. She furiously grabbed a bottle of pills and ran back to her room. After throwing the phone on her bed, she poured the pills into her hand. She stared at them for a minute, debating whether or not she should do it. No one would care. Why would they?

As she stared at her hand, she noticed all the lines on her palm. A memory flashed through her mind.

_"See all those lines on your palm? That's how many people in the world love you."_

She placed the handful of pills down on the table and looked at her hands. She didn't remember much about that night when Kendall told her about all the people that loved her, but she remembered him saying the amount of lines on your hand were the amount of people that loved her. She studied her hand and realized there were only four lines there. She knew those people who loved her must be Kendall, her mom, her dad, and someone else. Kendall and her mom would get over it fast if she died. Her father was dead, so it wouldn't even matter. And the last person must have been James, unless he was lying when he said he loved her. It didn't matter, though, because she didn't love herself.

She picked the pills up again, and in one gulp, swallowed them.

* * *

><p>A few hours later, Kendall, Carlos, Logan, and James burst through the door of apartment 2J, finding only Kendall's mom in the living room, watching TV.<p>

"Mom, did you turn off our game?" Kendall asked sadly.

"Yup, sorry," she replied. The four boys frowned.

"Well, since you left our game, will you make us some sandwitches?" Kendall asked hopefully. Mrs. Knight rolled her eyes, but stood up and got to work on their lunch.

"Will one of you guys go ask Katie if she wants anything?" Mrs. Knight asked. Carlos jumped up.

"I will!" he exclaimed, running away. He knocked on her door. "Katie! Do you want some lunch?" he asked. When he recieved no answer, he figured she was asleep and opened the door.

And at first he thought she was asleep, but when he noticed the empty bottle on the floor, he screamed.

**I'm really sorry if this was horrible. The idea just came to me, so I did it! I hope you guys liked it, and I'll try to update soon, but I have some stuff going on this week. **

**Review?**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for all the reviews! I'm sorry for the cliffhanger, but I hope you like this chapter! Sorry this took me so long to put up.**

I don't own Big Time Rush.

Kendall, Logan, and Mrs. Knight all looked up, glancing at each other with confused looks before rolling their eyes and going back to what they were doing. James, however, froze when he heard Carlos' scream. He had a horrible feeling he knew why he had screamed.

"Did you guys hear that?" James asked nervously, making sure he wasn't imagining it.

"Yeah, Katie probably just punched Carlos or something for waking her up," Kendall laughed, not even looking up from his phone.

"A-are you sure?" James asked. "It kinda sounded-"

"MRS. KNIGHT!" Carlos screamed, running back into the room. Tears were flowing freely down his cheeks as he tried to explain what happened to her, but no one could understand what he was saying. "K-Katie!" he finally choked out.

Kendall knew that voice. As soon as Carlos said his sister's name, he knew something was wrong. He ran to Katie's room as fast as he could, and when he saw her with the empty bottle, he screamed just as loud as Carlos. He heard footsteps coming behind him as he quickly scooped her into his arms.

He heard his mother gasp from behind him. "Someone call 911!" she shouted. Kendall saw James run across the room and pick up Katie's phone from her bed. The rest was just a blur for Kendall because he was so scared. He heard some yelling, and at some point, he ran out of her room and carried her downstairs. He barely remembered jumping into his mother's car and driving off, with Katie still in his lap. And all of the sudden, he ended up sitting in the waiting room at the hospital with James, Logan, Carlos, and his mother.

Kendall could hear Carlos sobbing from beside him, and he did his best to hold in his tears. His mother was squeezing his hand and had her head on his shoulder. James sat on the other side of her staying completely silent, and Logan was pacing back and forth in front of them. The blonde tried his hardest to think of a reason Katie would do this to herself, but it was all just making him angry. How could he have let this happen to her? Why didn't he realize something was wrong? He felt so guilty that he didn't even help her when she was upset.

"Um...I'll be right back," he said softly as he stood up.

"Where are you going?" Mrs. Knight asked.

"Bathroom," Kendall muttered. He gave his worried mother a tiny smile before walking away. He walked aimlessly through the halls for a couple minutes, only thinking about his sister and what could happen to her. He had no idea what might happen to her, but he could only hope she would be okay. He was too afraid to ask Logan if she would die or not. But did she _want_to die? That was why she took all those pills, wasn't it? Anger filled him to the brim when he realized she was trying to kill herself. When he realized she obviously wasn't thinking about how anyone else would feel if she died. She wasn't thinking about how he would feel, and he suddenly felt so much anger toward his little sister. He didn't understand how she could do that to him, and how she could carelessly try to throw her life away. Didn't she realize how amazing she was and how far she could go? Kendall felt himself getting angrier and angrier by the second.

"Kendall!"

He turned around and saw James, Carlos, and Logan running toward him. He glanced at all of them, but then stared down at the ground. He didn't want to have to talk to them about it.

"You okay, buddy?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Kendall mumbled.

"Your mom is talking to the doctor right now. She asked us to come find you," James said, causing Kendall to finally look up. "She said she wants you to be with Katie."

Kendall shook his head. "Yeah, well, I don't want to," he told them. They all gave him confused looks.

"Why not?" Carlos asked.

"I just don't want to see her. I'm...kind of...a little bit mad at her," he mumbled, barely letting them hear him. He knew they were just going to yell at him if he told them he was mad.

"You're mad at her?" Carlos asked. "Why would you be mad at her?"

"I just am! She shouldn't have done this! And she should have known how much it would hurt all of us!" Kendall felt tears sting his eyes, but he quickly blinked them away. "I mean, she could have come to us if she was upset about something!"

"Kendall, you can't blame her for this," Logan said. "None of us know why she did it, but she had to have a reason!"

"I don't care! She should've known-"

"Well, she clearly didn't!" James interrupted. Guilt was eating away at him. It was all his fault. He made her upset that morning, and he should have told Kendall what he knew right away, but he couldn't tell him now.

Kendall looked away from his friends, becoming angry with them, and saw his mother rushing toward him. She had a tiny smile on her face, so Kendall figured Katie was okay. He was happy about that, but he wasn't going to show it.

"Kendall, she's okay," she smiled, "The doctor said we got her here just in time, and we can go see her. Come on."

"No, Mom, I don't want to," he told her. The smile disappeared off of Mrs. Knight's face.

"Why?"

"I just don't want to," Kendall muttered.

"Kendall's mad at Katie," Carlos blurted out. "He thinks she was being stupid or something like that!"

Kendall glared at Carlos before looking back over at his mom. "I'm sorry, but I just don't want to see her right now, okay?" he told her. Mrs. Knight gave him a stern look.

"Well, you're coming. Katie needs you right now, you can't just ignore her!"

Before he could protest, she dragged him away, and he soon found himself staring down at his sleeping baby sister, his heart breaking more and more as each second passed.

* * *

><p>Katie's eyes slowly fluttered open, and she found herself in a bright, white room. She looked around in confusion for a moment, before realizing she was in a hospital. She remembered swallowing the pills and falling asleep, but she didn't think she would wake up again. She didn't want to.<p>

"Mom?" she whispered, noticing her mother sitting beside her.

Mrs. Knight looked over and sighed in relief. "Oh, Katie, you're awake!" she exclaimed, wrapping her daughter up in a hug. She kissed her head a thousand times, and Katie could hear her crying. "I was so worried about you, sweetie! You scared me!" She finally let go of her and looked right into Katie's eyes. "I knew you were upset about something! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Katie whispered, a tear slipping out of her eye. Mrs. Knight sighed and sat back in her seat.

"Please talk to me, Katie. Why did you do it?"

Katie stayed silent and avoided eye contact with her mother. Now she was just embarrassed. Her family probably thought she was stupid for trying to do what she did.

Mrs. Knight sighed once again. "Alright, we'll talk about it later..." Katie smiled at her mother, thanking her, and laid back in her bed.

That's when she saw her brother sitting across the room, staring at her. She smiled at him, but he just glared at her and looked away. Katie frowned and glanced up at her mother again.

Mrs. Knight stood up. "I'll be right back, okay? I have to just...run to the bathroom..."

Katie watched her mother as she walked over to Kendall. She knew they were trying to be quiet, but she could hear every word they said.

"Go over there with her," Mrs. Knight whispered.

"No! You can't leave me alone with her, Mom! I don't even want to be in here!" he whispered back. Katie felt more tears form in her eyes. She knew Kendall didn't love her.

"I don't care, Kendall! You need to talk to her! Now go!"

Kendall rolled his eyes before grumpily walking over to his sister and sitting beside the bed. Katie watched her mother leave, wishing she would come back, before staring down at her hands. The two sat in an uncomfortable silence for what felt like hours. Katie hated it, because it was never awkward between them, but now she was too afraid to say anything to him. She looked up at him and saw him staring at her. He quickly looked away from her, and Katie tried to keep her tears at bay.

"Kendall?" she whispered, a tear slipping from her eye. He ignored her, not even looking at her. "Are you mad at me?" she asked, even though she already knew the answer. She tried her hardest not to start crying, but she wanted him to say something to her. She wanted him to tell her he loved her and take care of her, and she wanted him to promise he would be there for her, but he said nothing. "Kendall, please!" she begged, speaking up again.

"Fine, Katie, yes, I'm mad at you!" he exclaimed, finally turning towards her. "I don't know why you thought I wouldn't be!"

Katie hastily wiped away a tear. "Well, I'm sorry..."

"No, you're not! You shouldn't have even done this, Katie! Do you know how worried we all were? You should've come to one of us and said something if you were upset! You should have told us if something was wrong instead of doing this!"

"I'm sorry!" she repeated.

Kendall shook his head, sending her a small glare once again. "Were you thinking about anyone else when you did that? Were you thinking about how anyone else would feel? You don't understand how scary it was when we all found you practically dead on the floor! I didn't know what was going to happen to you! I thought you were gonna die!"

"Well, I wish I did!" Katie shouted, glaring back at her brother. "No one would have cared, so why does it matter?"

Kendall raised his eyebrows in surprise, and his face softened. He suddenly felt guilty for treating her like that and for getting mad. He stared at her for a minute, his heart breaking as he watched tears fall from her eyes. He realized how close he was to losing her, and instead of being thankful that she was alive, he was yelling at her.

"Don't say that, Katie, please," he whispered. "I don't want you to feel like that and to think no one would care if you died. It's not true. At all."

"Yes it is," she muttered.

"Katie, no! I can't believe you're saying this! I can't even begin to describe how I would feel if you died! I mean, even just sitting here in the hospital with you is killing me! And I know I was just acting like a jerk, and I'm sorry," he said, "But, really, Katie, we all love you so much."

Katie stayed silent, unsure whether or not she should believe him. Kendall sighed and took his sister's hand, squeezing it tightly.

"Katie, please...why did you do it?" he questioned. "I just want to know so I can help you feel better."

She looked away immediately, refusing to tell him.

"You know you can tell me, Katie. I promise I won't tell anyone. Please," he begged.

"You'll just get mad again," she mumbled.

"I won't, I swear. I shouldn't have even been mad before. I'm sorry," he replied. "Please, Katie."

She stared down at her hands, completely avoiding eye contact and answering the question. She didn't want him to get mad again. She wanted her mother to come back just so she wouldn't have to talk about it. She heard Kendall sigh as he lifted her head and forced her to look at her. She saw the look on his face, and she instantly knew he was telling the truth about caring about her and loving her. He squeezed her hand again, and Katie took a deep breath, looked her brother in the eye, and quietly whispered the words she was too afraid to say.

"Because I'm not important...and no one loves me."

Kendall's heart shattered as soon as the words escaped her mouth. He tried to stop himself from getting too upset, but the thought of his baby sister feeling that way crushed him. He couldn't imagine why she would think that, because she was so wrong.

"What makes you think that?" he asked, looking at her as if she was crazy.

"I just know it... No one likes me, so I know it's true. Everyone hates me, actually," she told him. "And I know people don't want me. I'm just annoying and it would be better if I wasn't ali-"

"No, stop!" Kendall interrupted, closing his eyes for a moment. The disbelief racing around in his head almost made him dizzy, and when he opened his eyes, he saw tears in Katie's. "Don't ever say that again. It's not true," he promised. "And I want to know who made you feel like that!"

She looked up at him with her tear-filled eyes and whispered, "Everyone."

Kendall had to use all his strength not to get up and storm out of the room. He was mad. But not at Katie. He was mad at himself for not realizing his sister was feeling all of this. Because he was supposed to be the big brother that protected her, but clearly he didn't do his job.

So he knew, at that moment, that he had to help her. He had to show her how amazing she was, and prove to her how many people loved her. And he would make sure she knew, no matter what.

**Ew, the ending.**

**I was going to make this longer, but I didn't feel like writing anymore. But I wanted to get this posted. I got kinda stuck, but I know how I'm going to do the next chapter. Sorry if it was horrible. I had it all planned out in my head, but when I actually wrote it, it got me so frustrated. Well, yeah. I hope you liked it!**

**Review? :]**


	8. Chapter 8

**I know it's been like, a month since I updated this, so I'm sorry. Um... I have been doing like, nothing all summer. Ugh. All my friends are away. So...anyway...Thank you for all the reviews! :)**

**I don't own Big Time Rush.**

"I can't believe she did this. I mean, what could have made her so upset that she would hurt herself like this?" Logan asked, looking over at James and Carlos in the waiting room. Carlos nodded in agreement, his eyes still red and puffy from crying earlier.

"I know! I thought she was always so happy," Carlos answered sadly. He turned to look at James who had barely said anything since Kendall left to be with Katie. "And I can't believe she didn't tell any of us, especially Kendall, that something was wrong!"

"Yeah..." James muttered, guilt eating away at him even faster than it was before. He took a deep breath, debating whether or not he should tell his friends that he knew. They would be so angry, but he knew he should tell them. He stared down at the ground, trying to build up enough courage to tell them, but when he opened his mouth, nothing came out.

"Maybe she'll tell Kendall why she did it," Logan suggested.

"But Kendall probably won't even talk to her! He's really mad, and you know how he gets when he's mad," Carlos said. "I just hope Mrs. Knight doesn't let him freak out at Katie..."

James nervously played with his hands, realizing Kendall would be furious if he found out he knew Katie was being bullied. He ran his hand through his hair, sighing deeply, when he suddenly heard a little buzz coming from his pocket.

"What was that?" Carlos asked, looking at James. He reached into his pocket and pulled out Katie's phone, which he was still holding after calling 911 with it earlier.

"Katie's phone," he replied softly. He read on the screen that she had a new text, and although he knew he shouldn't invade her privacy, he couldn't stop himself from opening it.

"What is it?" Logan asked. He and Carlos watched as James' eyes widened and suddenly filled with tears. He blinked them away before shaking his head sadly. "James, what's wrong?"

He passed the phone over to his friends with a shaky hand, and Carlos and Logan both read it together, shocked and upset.

_Did you do it yet? Come on, Katie, we don't want to wait any longer? We want to get rid of you as fast as we can, so just go kill yourself now!_

"Who sent her this?" Carlos asked in disbelief. James shrugged.

"The number was private," he answered. Logan took the phone out of Carlos' hands and went to look through her other messages.

"Guys, there's like, ten other messages here telling Katie to kill herself!" he exclaimed. "Do you think she was being bullied or something?"

"Duh!" Carlos yelled, taking the phone back. He read through the texts, shaking his head as more tears formed in his eyes. "Why didn't she tell anyone? We could have helped her!"

James squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, taking a deep breath before speaking up. "I knew," he muttered. Carlos and Logan both turned to look at him, their eyes wide.

"You_ knew?_" Logan asked.

James nodded, closing his eyes again. "I found her crying in her room yesterday when I was looking for my comb. And then I took a note out of her hand, and it was from the kids at school, telling her to kill herself because no one would care. I told her it wasn't true, but she obviously didn't believe me," he explained, before finally looking back up at them.

"James, why didn't you tell anyone?" Carlos questioned.

"I promised Katie I wouldn't tell anyone! But I didn't think she would actually try to kill herself! And I tried to get her to tell Kendall, but she wouldn't. I'm sorry. You guys don't even understand how guilty I feel," he mumbled. He wiped the tears out his eyes quickly, praying that they wouldn't be too mad at him.

"It's not your fault, James," Logan said softly, sighing. Carlos nodded in agreement, smiling weakly at his friend. "If it's anyone's fault, it's definitely those stupid kids at her school! I mean, how could they do that to her?" he asked. He had never felt so much anger toward anyone before in his life, and he wanted so badly to find whoever sent her those texts.

"No, it is my fault! I shouldn't have made her upset this morning, and I should have just told you guys! Kendall could have helped her a lot better than I did," James said. He put his head in his hands, sighing, before looking back up again. "And Kendall's gonna kill me now."

"No, he won't. We'll stop him," Carlos assured him. "Kendall will understand, Katie didn't want him to know, so it's fine, okay?"

James shook his head, but before he could say anything, Mrs. Knight walked over to them and sat beside James. The three boys looked at her in confusion.

"I wanted Kendall to just spend some time with Katie," she told them.

"I thought Kendall was mad at her," Logan said.

Mrs. Knight nodded, "He is, and I wanted him to talk to her and realize how stupid he was being. And I knew he would be able to figure out why she did this. I couldn't get her to tell me anything."

Carlos and Logan both looked at James, who sighed and shook his head, silently begging his friends not to tell Mrs. Knight that he knew. He knew she would probably be just as mad as Kendall was going to be, and he didn't want to see the look on her face when she found out her daughter was being_ told_to kill herself. However, the look on Logan's and Carlos' faces told him that if he didn't say something, they would.

He let out a deep breath and looked at the woman. "Mrs. Knight, I know why Katie did it..." he said quietly, staring down at his hands, avoiding eye contact. He felt her staring at him waiting for him to go on, but he couldn't find his voice. If he started to talk, he knew he would end up crying, and he didn't want her to baby him and be sympathetic toward him if he did that.

"You know, James?" she asked. "How?"

He took a deep breath, swallowing his tears, and spoke up. "She...told me yesterday...that some kids at school were..." he paused, sighing. "They were bullying her, and...told her...to...kill herself," he whispered. Mrs. Knight's hand flew to her mouth, and her eyes widened. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you! I promised her I wouldn't tell, but I know now that I should have, and I'm so sorry, Mrs. Knight!"

"Don't apologize, sweetie," she said softly, wrapping her arm around him. "It's okay, I understand."

"No, I should have told you or Kendall, or I should have kept an eye on her to make sure she didn't actually do it, but I didn't, and I know this is all my fault, so I understand if you're all mad at me, but-"

"We're not mad at you, and it's not your fault!" Mrs. Knight assured him. "James, don't worry about it, honey. Katie should have told us, it's not your fault."

"No, she was scared. I don't blame her for not telling anyone. I_ forced_her to tell me! She didn't want to, but I made her!" he exclaimed. "And I swear, I will find those kids that gave her the note and sent her the texts, and I will personally give each of them a black eye," he promised, his eyes watering. Mrs. Knight laughed a little bit, even though James was dead serious.

"You can't beat up kids, James."

I don't care, I'll do it anyway," he said softly. Mrs. Knight smiled and wrapped her arms around the teenager, pulling him into a hug.

"I love you, sweetheart," she said softly. James smiled and wrapped his arms back around her.

"Love you too, Mama Knight."

**I end every single chapter with I love you's, haha. Okay, well, I hope you guys all liked this! It's gonna be longer than I thought. The next chapter will be Kendall and Katie again, and maybe everyone else too. So...yeah.**

**Review? :) Thank you guys!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey, guys! Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I've been too lazy to write.**

**OH, I'M GOING TO SEE BIG TIME RUSH TOMORROW. IN ONE DAY. AHH!**

**I don't own Big Time Rush.**

Kendall ran a hand through his hair, sighing, before looking back down at Katie. She quickly looked away, feeling awkward as he stared sadly at her. "So, um..._who _exactly made you feel like you weren't important?" Kendall finally asked.

"I told you already. Everyone," she said softly, glancing back up at him again. When she saw the look on his face, filled with guilt and embarrassment, she felt the same way as him.

Kendall nervously played with his hands. "So...I made you feel like that? And Mom did, too?" he asked, praying the answer would be no. If he made his own little sister feel so unloved, he wouldn't forgive himself. Ever.

Katie just shrugged. "Sometimes," she answered, staring at her hands. "I mean, it was mostly just the kids at my school, but sometimes..." She stopped, knowing Kendall now felt guilty. She shouldn't say anything else, because it wasn't _his _fault this happened, it was hers.

Kendall sighed. "Sometimes what? What did I do to you?" he questioned. "I just...want to know so I can make sure I don't do it again."

"No, you didn't do anything, Kendall," she replied. "It was all the kids at school, okay? They made me think-"

"You just said me and Mom hurt you!" he interrupted. "Please, just tell me how?" he begged. He was afraid that all of this was caused by her own family, or that they didn't treat her well enough.

"Just listen, okay? You didn't do anything! All the kids at school did it, okay? They kept telling me no one loved me, and that you and Mom and the guys hated me. They said I was annoying and stupid and-"

"Who said this? Why didn't you tell me?" Kendall asked, anger suddenly etched into his features. He saw the tears that were swimming in Katie's eyes, and he clenched his hand into a fist. "No one should be saying anything like that to you! Who was it, Katie?" he asked.

"Everyone, Kendall! Every single kid at that school!" she exclaimed, hurriedly blinking away her tears. "They all kept telling me to kill myself! They were telling me no one would care, and I eventually just believed them when I was always left sitting_ alone _in the apartment, while Mom was out, and you guys were working! Or when Carlos broke his arm and no one bothered to tell me! And then this morning, when everyone left, I kept getting texts, so I just did it, because I couldn't stand it anymore!"

Kendall sat in shock, anger burning inside of him, a surprised expression on his face. He couldn't believe all of this was going on, and he didn't even notice. "Katie, I'm so sorry," he said quietly. "I know what it's like to-"

"No, you don't know what it's like!" she snapped. "You were always one of the most popular kids in school! Everyone loved you! And now you're famous, and the whole world loves you! I'm just your stupid little sister who isn't going to go anywhere in life, and I'm tired of people telling me that!" she finished, tears now threatening to fall from her eyes. She tried to stop them, but she still felt one trickle down her cheek.

Kendall closed his eyes for a moment, sighing. "Okay, fine, I don't know what it's like, but trust me, it hurts just as much to see someone you love feeling that way," he told her. "And, all those people who tell you those kind of things are wrong! They're stupid! You're one of the smartest people I know! Trust me, just because you might not become famous doesn't mean you won't go far in life. And being famous isn't even that great! Whatever you end up doing will be better than what I'm doing!"

Katie rolled her eyes, "Yeah right..."

"Katie, I'm serious! Those kids that told you those things probably won't go anywhere! You're so smart, you can do whatever you want! You're already pretty famous! All our fans love you, they always ask questions about you. The dumb kids at your school are _clearly _just jealous that you're life is so much better than theirs."

"No it's not," she said softly.

"Yes it is! I swear! I mean, come on, they probably wish they could have famous brothers!" he smirked. Katie rolled her eyes and let a tiny smile creep onto her face.

"Well, maybe..." she muttered.

"And they probably wish that millions of girl all over the world were jealous of them, instead of you," he told her, smiling.

"I guess so..."

"And I'm _positive _they wish they had the best big brother in the whole entire world!"

Katie smiled, rolled her eyes again, and sat up to hug her brother. "Yeah, they probably are," she mumbled.

He ruffled her hair and hugged her back. "And if anyone is ever treating you like that, just remember what I told you when you were little," he said, pulling out of their hug and taking her hand. He held her palm up to show her. "The amount of lines on your hand are the amount of people in the world that love you," he told her. "And I love you the most. Always remember that, okay? All those lines on your hands, the big ones _and _the small ones are the same amount of people all over the world that will always be there for you, and who love you."

Katie nodded, the memory of that night coming back to her. She wished she could have remembered that this morning, before she caused all this trouble, but she knew it didn't matter to anyone anymore.

"You're perfect, Katie. I love you so much," he smiled. Katie smiled back and hugged her brother again.

"Love you too, Kendall."  
><strong><br>Ugh, okay, I completely forgot about the James problem! I'm gonna have to make this even longer now, so...this story isn't over yet.**

**Thanks for reading, and I'm sorry it was short (again), and I hope you liked it! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**I hate high school so much, ahfjdhfs.**

**Anyway, if you guys hate me, I totally understand, because this has taken me..I think like, 2 months to update. Maybe even more. And I am really, really sorry. I've been really busy, but volleyball just ended, so hopefully I can write more :) I also have some writer's block, so I'm so so so so sorry if this chapter is terrible.**

**I don't own anything at all.**

James stood nervously outside of Katie's room, going through what he was going to say to Kendall over and over again in his head. Honestly, he was scared. He knew Kendall would be angry with him for not telling anyone he knew Katie was upset. And when Kendall got angry, James got scared. He felt extremely guilty for everything that happened, and he was convinced that it was his fault, even if everyone else was saying it wasn't.

Finally, after building up enough courage, James knocked on the door lightly before pushing it open and stepping inside. Both Knights looked up at him, and Katie's cheeks quickly turned red from embarrassment. James, feeling even more guilty, smiled at her in hopes to make her feel better. However, she just looked away.

"Hey, James," Kendall said. "You wanna talk to Katie?" he asked.

James shook his head, nervously rubbed his hands together, and sighed. "Uh, no...I actually wanted to tell you something..."

Katie looked at him in confusion, because she knew exactly why he wanted to talk to Kendall, and she didn't understand why James was going to tell him. "Can I talk to James, Kendall?" she asked quickly. Kendall shrugged and nodded before allowing James to take his seat. He waved goodbye as he silently left the room. "What are you doing?" she asked.

"What do you mean? I just wanted to talk to Kendall," he told her, shrugging.

"You don't have to tell him, James. Besides, I already told him I was being bullied, and he's already mad about that. You don't want him to get even more mad, especially at you." she said. "Just don't tell him."

James shook his head. "No, I have to tell him, because if he finds out for himself, he'll hate me!"

"No he won't!" Katie insisted. "He wouldn't hate you because it's not your fault! It's mine. You didn't do anything!" she exclaimed. James sighed, shaking his head.

"I should've kept a better eye on you. And I know that I made a promise to you, but I should've just told him right away!" he replied, giving her an apologetic look. "I know that you were really upset, but we almost lost you. If you died, you do realize you would have never come back, right? And then you know how guilty I would have felt for the rest of my life?"

Katie sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry, James. I shouldn't have done it, I know, but-"

"I understand, Katie. But we were so close to losing you, and if I just told Kendall, that wouldn't have happened. He was able to prove to you how much we all love you, right?"

Katie nodded sheepishly, even though she wasn't sure if she believed it yet, and her cheeks turned red in embarrassment.

"Yeah, well, he could've done that before any of this happened if I just told him! I just feel so bad that I let this happen to you!" he exclaimed, running his hand through his hair.

"You didn't let this happen, I did! I ignored everything you said, and I was being stupid! Okay? Stop blaming yourself!"

Before James could reply, there was a knock on the door and Kendall popped his head back in. "Hey, Carlos, Logan, and Mom wanted to see you, Katie. Are you guys done talking?" he asked. Katie could see the confusion on his face, and she understood why he was giving them a curious look. She knew he wanted to know what they were talking about, but she didn't want him to be mad at James.

"Yeah, we're done," James said softly. Katie nodded as well, and watched as Kendall opened the door wider and everyone came running in. Carlos was by her side in an instant, pushing James out of the way. He pulled her into the tightest hug she had ever had and held her there for a few minutes before pulling away.

"I love you, Katie," he said, kissing her head. Katie smiled as Carlos stood back up and sat down in one of the chairs across the room. Before she knew it, Logan was hugging her and she could see Carlos crying in the corner. She closed her eyes and hugged Logan back. It suddenly hit her how much she affected everyone, and guilt was building up inside of her. She was trying her hardest not to start crying as she began to realize how stupid she was being, but tears were quickly coming her her eyes.

"Boys, do you mind if I talk to Katie alone for a moment?" Mrs. Knight asked. Logan let go of Katie and nodded with Kendall, Carlos, and James. She watched the four of them leave and then looked up at her mother. They stayed quiet for a little bit before Mrs. Knight spoke up. "Was Kendall lying to me when he said he wasn't mad anymore?" she asked.

"No, I don't think he's mad," Katie responded, looking away.

"Was he being mean?"

Katie shrugged. "At first, yes..."

Mrs. Knight frowned and sat down. "I'm sorry I left him here alone with you. I just didn't want him to be mad anymore. I knew if he talked to you he wouldn't be," she said. Katie nodded in understanding, and Mrs. Knight took a deep breath. "So, James told me."

Katie sighed, throwing her head back on her pillow. "Okay, I'm sorry. It's my fault, not his. I should have told you or Kendall, I know, but I was scared. James didn't know I was going to do this, I told him I wouldn't. So don't blame him, just blame me, and I get it if you're mad at me, just don't be mad at James."

"I'm not mad at either of you. I'm afraid Kendall will be, though," her mother responded. "James didn't tell him yet, did he?"

"No, and I don't want him to! I don't want everyone to be fighting because of me!" Katie exclaimed. "Because it's not James' fault! If Kendall is going to be mad, he should just be mad at me!"

Mrs. Knight shook her head. "He won't be mad, and if he is, he'll get over it. Don't worry." Katie nodded but said nothing, so her mother went on. "Katie, can you tell me how long this has been going on? How long were you being bullied?"

The young girl shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, a couple months, I guess. But I never had friends before that, obviously." Mrs. Knight smiled sadly at her daughter.

"Who exactly was bullying you?"

Katie groaned. "I already went through all of this with Kendall! It was everyone! Pretty much every single kid at school!"

Mrs. Knight nodded. "Alright, if you already talked to Kendall, you don't have to talk to me. But you will have to eventually, okay?" Katie nodded. "And know that I love you more than anything else in the world, alright?" She nodded again, blinking away tears and avoiding eye contact with her mother, but she still responded.

"I love you too."

**UGH. I seriously tried so hard. I have the next chapter planned already, so I'll try to get that up soon! Again, I'm so sorry for the long wait, but I love all of you guys! :) I hope you like this chapter, and I'm going to try my hardest to make the next one good! **


	11. Chapter 11

**I should really be doing all my stupid chores right now. Oh well.**

**I don't own anything.**

Kendall, James, Carlos, and Logan all sat outside of Katie's room, not speaking, just sitting there. James was trying to build up enough courage to tell Kendall everything he knew, and he was sure Carlos and Logan were waiting for him to say it. However, every time he opened his mouth to say it, he couldn't do it. He would end up fake coughing or yawning instead of actually saying anything. He didn't want to be fighting with Kendall, especially not now, when Katie needed them all. But he knew he had to tell him.

Luckily, Kendall finally spoke up. "James, what were you guys talking about?" he asked. Carlos and Logan both looked at the taller boy, who turned to Kendall. He took a deep breath before replying.

"I found out yesterday that Katie was being bullied." he blurted out, before he could stop himself. Kendall stared at him in shock for a minute before narrowing his eyes at him.

"You knew?" he asked. "Why didn't you tell me?"

James sighed, "I'm sorry, I was going to, but Katie made me promise that I wouldn't-"

"You could have at least kept an eye on her! Or tried to help her somehow!" Kendall shouted.

"I know, I'm sorry! It's my fault, I already know that! But I never thought she would actually try to kill herself!" James shouted back. "She told me she wouldn't!"

"That doesn't mean you can believe it! Do you realize where we are right now?" Kendall asked in disbelief.

James sighed. "Yes, I know, but-"

"You should have told me, James!"

"I promised Katie I wouldn't tell anyone! She was embarrassed!"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I know that, but maybe you could have at least kept an eye on her to make sure she didn't do anything like this! But you couldn't even do that?"

"Kendall, I tried! That's why I went to talk to her this morning after breakfast, but she was mad, and she ignored me!"

"I can't believe you didn't tell me! _I'm _her brother, not you! I would have been able to help her!" Kendall shouted. James rolled his eyes.

"Well, that's funny, because I think I remember her saying that she thought no one loved her, including you! Maybe because you kept starting fights with her, or ignored her, or never spent any time with her! I at least took the time to talk to her about it and tried to help her!"

"If I knew, I would've tried to help her too!" Kendall spat back. "But you didn't think it was important to tell me!"

"Maybe if you paid more attention to her, you could've figured it out!"

"Didn't you hear me this morning when I said I would go talk to her, but then _you _said you would! You probably made it worse!"

James glared at him. "At least I didn't yell at her after she almost died! I didn't tell her she was stupid, did I? No, but you did! You made her feel even worse about herself!"

Kendall stood up out of his chair. "You weren't even there with us, how would you know? That's not what happened when I was with her!"

"You were mad at her, Kendall! You were mad at her because she felt like you didn't love her!" James shouted, standing up as well.

"But she knows that I love her!"

"Clearly she doesn't!"

Suddenly, James was pulled away from Kendall. He found Carlos holding onto his arm, stopping him from punching his best friend in the face. "James, calm down, please."

James looked over to see Logan talking to Kendall, who looked furious. He sighed, feeling guilty again. He watched as Kendall pulled his arm away from Logan and then stormed back into Katie's room, almost slamming the door shut. A minute later, Mrs. Knight walked out, looking confused.

"Okay, why is he so mad? Did you tell him?" she asked James, who nodded guiltily. "It's okay, James, he'll get over it soon," she assured him. "He's just upset because of everything that's happened today. It's stressing him out, but he'll forget about it soon."

James shook his head. "No he won't, this isn't just a little fight. Katie almost died," he muttered. "And Kendall's right, I should have done something to help her," he said. He took a deep breath and walked into Katie's room. "Kendall, can-"

"Get out of here, James!" Kendall shouted, standing up. James backed up, shaking his head.

"Kendall, please, I'm sorry. Just let me-"

"No, leave us alone!" Kendall yelled. "I don't want you-"

Katie grabbed Kendall's arm to stop him from walking towards James. "Kendall, stop yelling at him! It's not his fault!"

Kendall ignored her. "You almost let my sister die! You can't just pretend you're sorry!" "I am sorry! Do you think I wanted this to happen?" James asked incredulously. "I swear, I tried to help! And I was going to tell you, but you wouldn't have been able to do any more than I did!" "Yes I would!" Kendall argued. "You obviously did nothing, because now she's in the hospital!"

"Kendall, stop! Leave him alone!" Katie begged. "It's not James' fault!" She watched sadly as they both ignored her and continued to fight. Her eyes filled with tears, and guilt rushed through her when she realized it was all her fault. None of this would have happened if she wasn't so stupid, or if she was good enough to make friends, or if she could do something useful in her life.

The two boys continued to yell at each, ignoring Katie's pleas for them to stop until finally, she had enough.

"Shut up!" she screamed. "If you guys are gonna fight, then do it somewhere else! You guys are both so stupid if you don't realize that it's my fault! And both of you guys should just feel equally guilty for ignoring me and fighting in front of me! So just get out of here!"

They both stopped talking and looked down at her to see her rubbing her eyes to stop herself from crying. Kendall glared at James, sending him an 'it's your fault' look before he knelt down by Katie's side. "Katie, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ignore you, are you okay?"

"No, Kendall!" she shouted, pushing him away. "Just leave me alone!"

He looked at her sadly, sighing. "Katie, I wasn't trying to make you upset, I'm sorry."

Katie ignored him, trying her hardest not to cry. "Just go away, please... I want to see Logan and Carlos," she said softly.

James walked over to her and sat beside her. "Katie, we're really sorry-"

Katie glared at both of them. "If you're sorry, then leave me alone! Go outside and stop fighting!" she exclaimed.

"Alright, fine," Kendall muttered, standing back up. "I'll get Logan and Carlos for you," he told her as he walked to the door. James nervously followed behind him, sending Katie an apologetic look. She watched them leave, folding her arms, until a minute later, Carlos and Logan walked in, smiling at her.

"Hey, Katie," Carlos smiled as he sat down beside her. "What happened?"

She looked at both of them for a second before hiding her face in her hands as she started to cry. The two boys exchanged a nervous look, eyes widening, unsure of what to do. Logan scooted closer to her and wrapped her in a hug.

"Katie, what's wrong?" he asked softly. She turned to hug him back, burying her head in his chest as she cried. Logan looked at Carlos with wide eyes, silently asking what he was supposed to do. Carlos shrugged, shaking his head. They haven't seen Katie cry like this is years, and even then, Kendall was always the one to make her feel better. So Logan just held onto her, gently rubbing her back, trying to calm her down.

Finally, she lifted her head off of Logan and wiped her eyes. "I-I wish we s-still l-lived in M-Minnesota..." she whispered.

"But I thought you loved it here," Carlos said, frowning. She shook her head, still rubbing her eyes.

"No, I-I hate it!" she cried. "I-I h-hate everyone here! Everyone is mean a-and crazy!"

The boys exchanged another look before Carlos pulled her into a hug. "Are all the kids at school really that mean to you?" he asked in disbelief. She nodded weakly. "Aw, Katie, I'm sorry," Carlos said softly. "We'll beat them all up if you want," he offered.

She smiled. "I don't want you guys to get in trouble," she replied. Carlos rolled his eyes.

"Who cares? They shouldn't be treating you like that. If anyone is ever mean to you, just let us know, and we'll beat them up, okay?"

Katie nodded, "Then I need you to beat up James and Kendall."

Logan smiled. "They were being mean to you?"

"No, but they were being annoying," she mumbled. "And they did ignore me, and they're stupid," she said. Carlos and Logan both laughed.

"Okay, but James is stronger than us, so he'll end up beating us up... And I'm scared of Kendall sometimes," Logan told her. Katie rolled her eyes but smiled and hugged them both.

"Thanks, guys," she said softly. "You're the best."  
><strong><br>****BL****E****AAAHH****, THE ENDING, I'M SORRY!**

**The other night, I was really upset**** because I miss my friends and never see them anymore, and ****my**** sister was forcing me to tell her what was wrong, and I started crying,**** an****d it made me realize how hard ****it is to talk ****when you're ****crying. Sorry that was random...**

**Okay, well, ****I hope you guys liked this****... I guess it didn****'t suck too bad****?**

**Thank you guys and I love you and also the new Time of Our Life video they made for tonight's episode is r****eally cute with all the pu****ppies, I almost died.**

**Review? :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Can ****I quit high school****..?**

**I'm the worst, and I'm so sorry. It's been taking me so long to**** write stuff, but...I blame school and homework and tes****ts and everything else.**

**But I'm trying really hard to write this when I reall****y should be doing homework. So ****I hope you all like it, and I'm so sorry for the long wait :/**

I own nothing.

Katie walked through the door of 2J, Kendall, Carlos, Logan, James, and her mother all following behind her. As happy as she was to be home, she didn't want to be here, where all the problems had started. She didn't want to go into her room and remind herself of what happened just a week before. She didn't want to hear her brothers constantly fighting anymore, and she didn't want to go back to school. Ever again.

She knew everything was just going to get worse now. Everyone from her school definitely knew what happened, and she knew all she was going to hear would be "too bad you're still alive" or "you should try again". However, now she knew how wrong she was. She knew it was a huge mistake, and she didn't want to hurt her family again. But she was afraid she would start to believe all the kids again.

"Katie, do you want something to eat?" Mrs. Knight asked. "I can make some spaghetti for dinner, I know that's your favorite," she smiled. Katie shrugged.

"It doesn't matter to me, whatever you guys want..." she mumbled before walking off to her room. She sat down on her bed only to find Kendall standing in the doorway. He stared at her worriedly, and she stared back with a confused, annoyed expression on her face. "What do you want?" she sighed, looking down at the ground.

Kendall shrugged and walked in, closing the door behind him. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something? Or go down to the pool?" he asked as he sat down beside her.

"No," Katie answered, sighing. "I just want to be alone," she told him. Kendall sighed and put his arm around his little sister's shoulder.

"You know I'm not leaving you alone. And least not yet," he said. "I'm sorry, I know it's what you want, but I don't want anything happening to you." Katie closed her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath.

"I'm not going to do anything," she promised him.

Kendall nodded. "I know, but just in case. And I want you to know that you don't_ have _to be alone. I'm here for you, okay? I want you to be happy again, so what can I do for you to make you happy?" he asked. Katie thought for a minute before looking up at him.

"Leave me alone?" she suggested. "Then I'll be happy!"

"No, if I leave you alone, I know you're just gonna sit here and cry or feel bad again. Katie, I don't want you to be upset anymore."

She looked down at her hands. "I don't want to sit there and listen to you and James fight...a-and I don't want people to be staring at me. I just feel guilty because I know you would all be happy still if it weren't for me..." she muttered.

"I promise me and James won't fight, and no one will stare at you! If you're worried about that, then we can stay here! We can do whatever you want! And I'll be happy if you're happy. It's not your fault people treat you badly, Katie, you shouldn't feel guilty!" he told her.

She stared down at the ground for a minute, not answering him. She couldn't help but feel guilty. She did all of this to her family. They were all upset just because she was. She was tired of causing so many problems and ruining everything. She hated that she was so annoying to _everyone_. Tears filled her eyes as she stared at the carpet, and she tried so hard to keep them away, but Kendall already noticed. Before she knew it, she was wrapped in his arms, sobbing into his shoulder.

"Katie, I wish you knew how perfect you are. I couldn't have asked for a better little sister," he said softly. "You need to stop blaming yourself and telling yourself those kids at school were right. I swear, if they were just a little bit older, I would have beat them all up for you. None of us like seeing you like this. We just want you to know how great you are," he told her, rubbing her back as she cried.

"P-please, d-don't make m-me go back th-there," she begged. "I-I never w-want to see th-them a-again!"

Kendall tightened his grip on her, "I know, I know. You don't have to go back, you never have to." As he spoke, he prayed his mother would agree. He knew she most likely would, but there weren't many schools around them that Katie could go to, and he knew she couldn't be home schooled again. "It's gonna get better, Katie, I promise. We're all here for you, and if you're ever alone, we'll do whatever you want with you," he promised.

"I just want a friend," she whispered. She didn't want to sound ungrateful, but she needed a girl her own age, not her older brothers and her mother. As much as she loved spending time with them, she still just needed someone who would love her for reasons other than being family.

Kendall sighed and rubbed her back, knowing she was right. She deserved a friend, and if he could, he would give her one. The best he could do was give her James, Carlos, or Logan, and he knew that wouldn't even be enough, considering they were basically family anyway. "D-do you wanna hang out with Jo sometime? That way you could spend time with another girl. I'm sure she would love hang out with you," he offered. Katie shrugged. It wasn't that bad of an idea to her, but what if Jo didn't really want to? She probably only would if Kendall asked her to.

"Jo doesn't wanna hang out with me... I'm too young," Katie mumbled sadly.

Kendall shook his head, " No, Katie, she loves you! She would love to spend time with you! Maybe you guys can go to the mall or something, you can go shopping or whatever girls do!" he suggested. Katie shrugged again.

"She'll only say yes because you asked her to," she sighed. Kendall shook his head, beginning to feel frustrated with his sister. It wasn't that he was mad, he was just upset that she didn't know how special she was, thanks to all those stupid kids at her school...

"Katie, listen, you need to stop thinking about what those dumb kids said to you. They didn't even get a chance to know you, so why do they have a right to say you're stupid? I mean, come on, you're the smartest kid I know!" he exclaimed.

"What about Logan?"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Logan doesn't count, he's more like a childish adult trapped in a kid's body, you know?" he asked. Katie laughed and nodded, making Kendall smile. All he wanted was for his sister to laugh, to be happy again. "But anyway, how could they call you ugly, too? To me, you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my _life_."

Katie looked up at him, disbelief on her face. "Including Jo?"

"Yes, including Jo. Between you and me, you're a thousand times prettier," he said with a smile. Katie rolled her eyes and looked away. Kendall forced her to look at him again. "And why would they be mean to you when you're the sweetest little girl ever?" he asked. Katie looked up at him, holding back a laugh, and Kendall smiled back. "Okay, maybe you're not the nicest..." he laughed, making Katie giggle too. "But who cares! You're nicer than all of them, aren't you? You would _never _tell anyone to hurt themselves, and I know that."

Katie nodded. Even if she didn't like someone, she would only playfully tease them like she does with Bitters or her brothers. She would never tell them they have no reason to be alive...

"And what would make them think you're annoying?" Kendall continued. "What have you ever done to them besides maybe letting them copy off your homework and tests?" he asked. Katie thought about that. She realized he was right; she barely ever even spoke to them unless they wanted something from her. "And back to my first point, why would they call you stupid if they wanted your answers?"

Katie smiled and nodded slowly. He was right. She always let everybody copy off of her, she was never mean to anyone, and she just kept to herself. Why did people start hating her in the first place? Even if she was annoying, or stupid, or worthless, how would they know if they never even got the chance to know her?

"So stop comparing yourself to the people around you, Katie. Ignore the people who are clearly just jealous and insecure about themselves when they call you names. You're a million times cooler than them because you don't care about what others think. At least, you used to not care, and I miss when you didn't. You just gotta be yourself, okay? Don't let those losers trick you into thinking you're not good enough," he begged.

Katie nodded and wrapped her arms around her brother's waist, pulling herself closer to him. He smiled and hugged her back, praying she was starting to believe him. He didn't want to have to force her to go to therapy or something. He knew she wouldn't want to, but if she didn't start to get better, he knew she would have to.

"Kendall?"

"Yeah?"

"Why does everyone love you but hate me?" Katie questioned, finally voicing her thought that had been in her mind for months.

Kendall closed his eyes. "Katie..." he whispered. "Please, don't say that. That's not true, you know that," he said softly.

Katie rolled her eyes. "No, shut up, Kendall. It _is_ true, and _you know that."_

Kendall sighed. "Katie, come on, it's_ not _true. I don't know how many times I'm going to have to tell you, no one hates you! But guess what! Tons of people hate me! Big Time Rush gets made fun of all the time! There are people who say we're untalented and stupid and-"

"Well you have tons of people who love you, too. And they all stick up for you when they don't even know you!" she pointed out.

"Katie, tons of people love you too, okay? And we will always stick up for you-"

"But you guys didn't!" she yelled. "No one did!"

Kendall looked at her in confusion, surprised by her sudden outburst. His face softened when he realized she was right. No one was there to help her. None of them were. He even started fights with her and told her she was annoying without even realizing how much it hurt her. She was all alone the whole time, and it took almost dying for people to realize.

He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Baby Sister. We should've been there. I promise I will be from now on, alright?"

She nodded, not even looking up at him. He sighed and wrapped her in a hug once again, guilt swimming through him. Nothing he was saying was working. She didn't believe him, and he feared she never would.

A minute later, when they were called out for dinner, he thought about everything he needed to do for her to make things at least a little bit better.

First, talk to James.  
><strong><br>****Ble****hh****.**

**This st****ory is going to be a lot longer than I plan****ned, haha****. I w****as going to keep writing this chapter, but I ****figured I would stop it here so I di****dn't ****keep you guys wa****iting any longer. ****And because I have to writer a 1,200 word ****essay on a book I didn't even read by tomorrow, so I should probably start on that, haha.**

**I hope you all liked it! :) Sorry for any mistakes, heh :/ Review?**


	13. Chapter 13

**It is so cold in my house right now, I'm lit****erally shaking.**

**Anyway****, thank you guys so much for the reviews! :) I'm still really sorry for all the long waits, I feel so ****bad, but I really am tryin****g. ****This story is just not good anymore, haha, but I'll try to somehow make it more exciting. If anyone has any ideas, let me know****! :)**

**I don't own Big Time Rush.**

Kendall led Katie out of her room for dinner after calming her down, a new goal set in his mind. He was going to make everything better for her. He was going to try to get everything to go back to the way it used to be, when everyone got along and everyone was happy. He was determined to get everything back to normal.

They sat down at the table without saying a word, and everyone silently began to eat their dinner. Kendall looked up at James for a second, to find his friend staring down at his plate. He sighed and looked at Katie, who wasn't even eating any of her food, just miserably playing with it.

"So, do you boys have rehearsal tomorrow?" Mrs. Knight finally asked when she couldn't take the silence any longer.

"Yeah," Kendall replied.

They all fell silent again until Katie spoke up. "Mom? Do I have to go to school tomorrow?" she asked, praying the answer was no. Her mother sighed.

"Well, Katie, you're going to have to go back eventually. I'll let you stay home tomorrow but-"

"No!" Katie interrupted. "Can't I go to a different school? Or be home-schooled? I'll do anything but go back there, Mom, please," she begged. "I'm just gonna get made fun of even more! P-people are gonna tell me I should try to kill myself again! It's just gonna get worse, please don't make me go back there!"

Mrs. Knight looked around at everyone sitting at the table. Katie looked at her hopefully before looking around at the boys as well. They all held blank expressions on their faces, unsure of what they were supposed to say.

"Mom," Kendall spoke up. "You can't make her go back. That wouldn't be fair, right? We have money to hire a tutor now or something," he suggested.

"I know, but..." she trailed off. Kendall looked at her in confusion. Did she really want Katie to go back to that awful place? "We'll talk about it later," she said softly before standing up. "Is everyone finished?" she asked.

Everyone nodded and passed her their plates. Katie stood up and ran off to her room once again. Kendall glanced up at Logan and Carlos.

"Will you guys go keep an eye on her?" he asked. They both nodded and stood up, as well as James, but Kendall stopped him. "Wait, James," he said. The taller boy turned back around, and Kendall waited for the other two to leave before he opened his mouth to speak, but James interrupted him.

"If you're going to yell at me again, then for the fiftieth time, I'm sorry, Kendall," James said. Kendall shook his head quickly.

"No, no...I-I just wanted to say..." he paused, sighing. "I'm really sorry for yelling at you and everything. It really wasn't your fault at all, and I was just taking my anger out at you, but I shouldn't have, and I know now that you did all you could for her, and it's mostly my fault this happened, and...I'm sorry."

James looked at him in surprise. "Are you...just saying that so Katie won't be mad at us?" James asked, looking at Kendall in confusion.

The blonde sighed, shaking his head. "No, I should've never even been mad in the first place. Plus, I do feel really bad for yelling at you...especially when it was in front of Katie," he said softly. "But I really am sorry! I-it wasn't your fault at all. It wasn't anyone's fault but mine, and I don't know why I even yelled at you and Katie in the first place."

"Kendall, are you serious? It's not your fault, either," James said. "I thought you and Katie already talked about how it was those kids' faults..."

"Well, yeah, I guess it was," Kendall muttered. "But I should have noticed what was going on. You guys didn't start stupid fights with her and call her annoying, and I just didn't even notice how sad she always was..."

"Who cares, she's fine now."

Kendall closed his eyes. He was about to argue and say she wasn't, but he knew he couldn't start any more fights with James. So he just nodded. "Well, let's go try to convince Katie to watch a movie with us or something," he said softly.

James nodded and followed Kendall into her room, where she was sitting with Logan and Carlos. Katie was staring down at her phone while Logan and Carlos smacked each other back and forth, obviously after getting into a little argument.

"What are you guys doing?" James asked, eying them all warily. He looked down at Katie to see that she looked a bit upset as she stared at the screen of her phone. Kendall walked over to her and sat behind her bed, and she immediately turned her phone off and put it in her lap before leaning into his arms. Kendall smiled sadly.

"Is everything okay, Baby Sister?" he asked worriedly, glancing down at her phone. "Were people texting you?"

"No," she lied. "I'm fine."

Kendall sighed, looking up at his friends for a second. "Okay, well... Do you want to watch a movie now? Or we can go out and get some ice cream or something? What do you want to do?" he asked, praying she would agree to at least _something_.

She remained silent for a moment before looking up at him. "I...I just kind of want to go to sleep," she said softly. Kendall closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath.

"Come on, Katie, please," he begged. "We don't have to leave the apartment, we can even stay in your room if you want," he offered. "Just do something with us, please. Don't you wanna have some fun?" he asked.

"Yeah, but I'm not_ going _to have any fun," she pointed out. Kendall ran a hand through his hair before wrapping his sister in a hug. He wished this could just be easier. He wished he knew how to make her happy, but it seemed almost impossible. He hated that those kids completely changed her life in only a couple months.

"Katie, I'm going to convince Mom to let you switch schools," he told her quietly, gently stroking her hair. "I promise I won't stop bugging her until she agrees and lets you. Will that make you happy?" he asked hopefully.

Katie curled up in his arms. "I don't know," she whispered softly, closing her eyes and hoping she would fall asleep before they made her do anything with them. She didn't want to leave the apartment. And she knew they wouldn't make her, but she was just scared. She didn't want to get any more texts saying "you should try again", and "I wish you actually died". She had gotten at least ten so far, since she got home, and she considered telling one of them, but she just felt like she couldn't.

"Okay, well...for now, please just come watch a movie with us. You can pick what it is," Kendall offered. "And you can fall asleep while we're watching it. But it's only 7:00 right now, you can't really be tired."

Katie groaned. "Alright, fine," she muttered. "Just let me put my pajamas on..." She stood up and hurriedly pushed them out of her room. After grabbing some pajamas to change into, she heard her phone buzzing. For a moment, she just stood there, considering whether or not she should even look at it. She stared at the phone that was on the bed from across the room, finally deciding to look. She rushed over and picked it up.

_So we all heard about how you tried to kill yourself, Katie, and the whole school, including teachers, are really annoyed that you're still alive. Either try again, or we'll make you wish you did when you get back to school._

Katie read over the text a few times before dropping the phone back onto the bed. She wiped the tears out of her eyes before slowly changing into her pajamas. As soon as she was done, she heard a knock on the door.

"Katie? Can I come in for a second?"

She wiped away all her tears before shouting back a tiny yes. The door opened and Kendall walked in, frowning when he saw that she was obviously just crying. He saw right through her, knowing that something had to have happened since they left her room, which couldn't have been more than five minutes ago.

"Why are you crying, Katie? What happened?" he asked immediately, reaching for her phone. She pulled her hand away.

"Nothing, Kendall, I'm fine," she mumbled. "Let's just go watch the movie."

"No, Katie, I know you were crying. Please tell me what happened. Did someone from school text you?" he asked. "They've been sending you mean texts all day, haven't they?"

"No, Kendall! It's fine, let's just go!" she yelled. She put her phone on her bed before taking Kendall's arm and dragging him out of the room before he could grab it.

But he was determined to find out what was going on.

**Bleeeh. If anyone has any ideas, you should probably maybe tell me ****if you want because ****this is just not good.**

**I hope you guys all liked it anyway. I'm trying to write a new one-shot, but I don't know when I'll be putting it up, but...yep.**

**Review, please? :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hellooo, everyone :)Thank you guys so much for the reviews, they really mean a lot. And thanks to anyone who gave me ideas! I was going to do something stupid, but then briorca18 gave me a better idea, so thank you so much to her! :)**

**I hope you guys like this! Thanks again for the reviews!**

**I don't own Big Time Rush or Purple Sky by Greyson Chance.**

Kendall walked with Katie out to the living room where Carlos, Logan, James, and Mrs. Knight were all waiting, sitting on the couch. There was a pile of movies on the table for Katie to choose from, but she didn't even want to choose. She sat down on the couch, not saying anything, so Kendall handed her some.

"What do you want to watch, Katie?" he asked, sitting down beside her. She only shrugged, glancing down at the movies in her lap.

"I don't really care," she muttered. "Let's just watch this," she said as she passed Finding Nemo over to Kendall. He smiled and stood up to put the movie in. When he sat back down, he pulled Katie onto his lap before pushing play. She sat silently, feeling more and more uncomfortable as every second passed.

She knew everyone understood how she was feeling, but whenever she was around her brothers, who were always popular in school and who were now famous, she just felt awful. She was the disappointment in the family. And she always wondered why she couldn't be as cool as them. Or as talented, or nice, or funny. She was none of those things, and no matter who she was with, she felt like they were judging her for it.

She knew deep down that her brothers and her mom would never judge her. She knew it, but at the same time, it was hard believe. When people told her constantly that no one loved her, it scared her. What if she did something that caused them all to hate her?

So many thoughts like that ran through her head as she watched the movie. And as much as she didn't want to watch it, she was now glad she did. It was better than laying around in her room, reading through all the texts she was getting. She prayed that if she really could go to a different school, they would eventually stop. Maybe if she just stopped looking at her phone, she would forget about it.

However, she knew that wouldn't work. It never would. As much as she hated seeing them, she was always curious, and she wanted to know what they were saying about her now.

She realized about half-way through the movie that she wasn't paying attention to any of it. She didn't realize everyone else was eating popcorn and laughing because she was too wrapped up in all her thoughts. She sighed, closing her eyes, and before she knew it, she was asleep.

* * *

><p>"Katie?" Kendall whispered, looking down at his sister when the movie ended. "She's asleep," he said, looking up at everyone else.<p>

"Why does she always fall asleep while watching movies?" Carlos asked incredulously. "I mean, come on, Finding Nemo is the best movie! How could she-"

"Carlos, shut up, or you'll wake her up!" Logan exclaimed. "And she needs sleep, I don't think she slept much in the hospital," he said softly.

Kendall nodded and he scooped Katie into his arms. "I'll bring her to bed. Can one of you guys grab her blankets, my mom washed them all today."

James nodded. "I'll do it," he offered.

Kendall thanked him as he walked off to Katie's room, carefully carrying her bridal style. He groaned in frustration when he saw that there were things all over her bed. As carefully as he could, he balanced her in one arm and moved everything, until he found her phone. He put it on her desk and laid her down in the bed, before he heard the phone go off. He curiously turned to the desk and picked it up, seeing that she had a bunch of new text messages.

"Is this the right one, Kendall?" James asked, walking through the door holding a big blanket.

"Yeah, but...would it be really wrong of me to look through Katie's messages?" Kendall questioned. "I mean, yeah, it would be, but...you know, what if someone tells her to kill herself again?" he asked.

James narrowed his eyes in confusion and walked over to his friend. "How many new texts does she have?" he asked, looking over Kendall's shoulder. He knew it was wrong, too, but he was worried. He wanted nothing more than for Katie to stop being bullied, and he had to admit that he was curious.

"She has...12 new texts," Kendall answered. "Who do you think they're from? I mean, I know this is awful, but..." Kendall turned around to James and lowered his voice. "I-if she doesn't have many friends here, people don't usually text her," he pointed out in a whisper. "Unless they're friends from Minnesota, but..." Kendall sighed. "Should we just look?" he asked.

James nodded, a bit of nervousness in his eyes. But they had to make sure she wasn't being insulted or bullied or anything like that. If the texts were bad, they had to delete them so she couldn't opened up the first text and sighed when he read it. He looked at James before reading it once again, out loud.

"I think I might kill myself out of sadness that you didn't die, Katie," he read, anger coursing through him. He opened up the next one. "You're so pathetic, Katie. You actually tried to kill yourself? You baby. I just hope it works next time."

James shook his head, taking the phone out of Kendall's hand. "Why would they even call her a baby? They are such idiots! They did this to her!" he exclaimed. "This is rediculous, we have to go to the school and say something!"

Kendall nodded as he took the phone back. "I know, but Katie doesn't want people to think she's weak for telling on them," he said with an eye roll. "But I'm beginning to think we should..."

James nodded in agreement. "Read the next one," he said. Kendall clicked on the next text.

"If you don't try to kill yourself again..." Kendall paused, and James was pretty sure he saw some tears in his eyes. "I'll find you and kill you myself. Much love, Eric."

They both stood in silence for a moment, rereading the text over and over again before James finally spoke up. "Kendall..." he said quietly. "We can go to the police with this, can't we? It's a threat."

Kendall shook his head, clenching his teeth to stop himself from screaming. "Yes, we probably can, but I've had enough, I'm calling this kid," he said furiously, storming out of the room with the phone. James ran after him, eyes wide.

"Wait, Kendall! I think this is what Katie doesn't want you to do!" he exclaimed.

"You know what, I don't care!" Kendall shouted. "This is too much! I'm done hearing about what these kids are saying to her and not doing anything about it! I'm calling this kid!"

James sighed and watched as Kendall dialed the number and held the phone up to his ear. Carlos and Logan joined them, confusion clouding their eyes, and James didn't even have time to explain before Kendall starting shouting into the phone.

"Who are you and why the hell are you sending my little sister death threats!" he yelled.

Carlos' and Logan's eyes widened and they looked at James. He shook his head, letting out a sigh as Kendall continued on.

"No, I don't care if you were kidding! I could call the cops if I wanted to! You have no right to tell my sister, or anyone else, to kill themself! And if you think you're going to get away with it, you're not! I swear, I will find you and I will hit you so hard you won't even cry! I don't care if you're twelve, I swear I would do it!" he shouted.

"Should we stop him?" Logan asked, looking worriedly at Kendall. "He can't actually do that."

Carlos shrugged. "Hey, that kid deserves it, obviously. And Kendall wouldn't actually do it, he's just trying to scare the kid!" he said.

James looked at both of them. "Well, he might actually do it," he pointed out. "I mean, look at him, he's-"

"What's going on?"

All three boys turned to see Katie watching them with wide eyes. Kendall didn't even notice that she was there, and he continued to yell into the phone.

"You can tell all your stupid little friends that if I see one more text to Katie that says anything about killing herself, any of you killing her, or any other mean words to her, I swear, I will beat you so hard! I don't even care how old you are anymore, it's ridiculous, and I'm sick of seeing all you stupid kids treating her like she doesn't have feelings and she's not important! Because she is, and she's a lot better than you at _everything!" _he shouted. "So either leave her alone, or I will call the police and make you feel just as bad as you made her feel!"

Katie stared with wide eyes at her brother, her mouth hanging open. She watched as Kendall shouted a curse word into the phone before furiously hanging up, and finally turning back around. When he saw her standing there, he froze.

"Katie..." he said softly. She stared at him in surprise for a moment before her eyes filled with unwanted tears and her bottom lip began to tremble. Kendall walked over to her, knelt down in front of her, and pulled her into a tight hug. "Katie, why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.

"I-I'm sorry," she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I...I was embarrassed. I just...I'm scared, Kendall," she whispered. Kendall picked her up and quietly left the hallway, walking back into her room and sitting down on her bed. He held her tightly in his arms as a tear escaped his own eye.

"Why are you crying?" Katie asked.

Kendall sighed, hastily wiping away the tear. He shook his head. "I-I don't know. I'm just so tired of seeing you like this," he whispered. "You don't have to be embarrassed. You shouldn't be." he told her. "I know you're scared, but I would never ever think anything badly of you," he assured her, kissing her head. "I love you, Katie, and it honestly breaks my heart to see you go through this."

Katie closed her eyes, resting her head on his shoulder. "Thank you," she whispered. "I'm glad you saw the texts."

Kendall nodded. "Me too, Baby Sister. I'm not gonna let them send those things to you anymore. I promise I'm gonna make this all end," he whispered.

Katie smiled. "Who were you talking to on the phone?" she asked. "And what did the text say? Why did you get so angry?"

"Some kid named Eric," he answered. "I got angry because he was being mean to you. It wasn't fair. And he said something we can report to the police," he told her. Katie immediately shook her head.

"No, we're not doing that!" she exclaimed. "Please, Eric will kill me if-"

"Don't say that!" Kendall interrupted. He closed his eyes, sighing. "We'll talk about it later, okay? Let's just go to sleep right now."

Katie sighed, but nodded. Kendall tucked her into her bed before laying down beside her. "Can you sing to me?" she asked, looking at him hopefully. Kendall smiled and nodded.

"_Purple skies and violet rainbows,_

_and all the angels passing by,_

_with their words they try to break you,_

_but they can't shake you with all their lies_," he sang, gently playing with her hair.

"_Another day we will survive,_

_another day is worth the fight,_

_today we will rise._

_We will walk the rainbows,_

_and take over the skies._

_Don't let them change you, no._

_'Cause you are beautiful,_

_just like the purple sky_," he finished when he saw she was asleep.

He sighed as he looked down at his sister. "I love you, Baby Sister," he whispered.

**Ah, okay, guys. Go listen to Purple Sky by Greyson Chance because it's beautiful. I didn't type the whole song because apparently that's against the rules... I don't know.**

**I hope you all liked this chapter! :) It would mean a lot if you left a review!**


	15. Author's Note

First of all, I'm sorry to anyone who actually might be reading this and to anyone that cares, if you were expecting this to be a new chapter, then yeah, I'm sorry.

I guess it's been like, almost a year since I posted a new chapter to this, and since I posted anything at all. So yeah, I'm just explaining why.

At this time last year (and the year before I guess), I kinda just really hated my life. Not in the way where I wanted to hurt myself or anything like that, but in the way where I was just always really miserable. I felt like literally everyone around me hated me and no one cared about me except for maybe my sisters, my parents, and like two friends. But even my parents were always starting fights with me and just being annoying.

I went to a new school last year, and the people in some of my classes kind of in a way made fun of me for being shy and then would pretend to be nice to me so they could copy all my work and so I would let them copy off my tests, and I was too afraid to say no, so I just let them. I pretty much sat alone at lunch almost every day because the people I sat with would cut me out of their circle, and I would sit alone on the end in silence, and they wouldn't even say hi to me. I just felt really alone every day, and I just hated my life. Even writing this and thinking about it is making me want to cry.

So I'm not looking for sympathy or anything, I'm just explaining that I was just always sad, and writing these sad stories on here was my way of letting it out. I honestly don't know why, because I love this band more than anything, but it just kinda helped.

So, I'm not writing anymore because basically, in the past year, my life just started to turn around. My classes still sucked, but I started to find people to sit with at lunch, who would say hi to me in the hallways and who even started talking to me outside of school. And this year, some of them have become my best friends, and all of my classes are really nice, and it's completely different.

And another reason I'm telling you all this, is because I want anyone who might be going through something like this to know that even though people say this all the time, it really does get better, I promise. I used to tell myself that I would have to get through high school sitting alone at lunch and listening to random people tease me for no reason every day, but it all changed.

And if you ever see anyone sitting alone or just looking lonely, just sit with them for a little or even just smile at them or anything really, because anything is better than just ignoring them and acting like they're not even there.

And I've never really told anyone about this, because I was embarrassed and I really didn't think anyone would care. So if any of you are ever sad about literally anything, you can always come to me. I won't be writing anymore, but I'll still check my old email and if you need to talk to someone and you want to PM me, you can at any time, and I'll try to respond.

And another thing, I want to thank everyone on here. Honestly I don't know if anyone is even reading this or if anyone cares at all, but talking to people on this site always made me feel better. And whenever I got a review, it really made me so happy. And not because I was happy to have reviews, but because it made me feel like some people actually noticed me and actually cared at least a little bit about something I was doing. So thank you to everyone reading this, or anyone who has read any of my old stuff. You guys made me happy when the people I actually knew and talked to every day of my life just made me miserable. It means so much to me, and I love you guys so much.

So, I just wanted to tell you all why I just kinda suddenly stopped writing all this weird, random, sad stuff, and why I even wrote it in the first place. And I wanted to thank you guys for just being amazing people, and I hope you guys never have to feel the way I did, because you're all so amazing and beautiful and you all deserve to know that. So thank you guys, and I love you all so much.


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